Thursday, January 5, 2012

How pregnancy and maternity leave killed my career

4 years ago before I had my first daughter the last 2 months of work before maternity leave was stressful to say the least. We were getting ready to launch our new release and I was the Director of Product Management. While I was spending countless hours trying to make sure things didn’t fall through while I was away for 12 weeks, rumors were spreading that the division was going to be sold off and I likely would not have a job when I got back.

Instead of helping me understand changes that were likely to be made while I was gone, management kept information from me. This behavior was very unlike them as I had been ‘in the know’ in the past. I was never the last person to know what was going on. It was almost like they were trying to keep information from me to lessen the stress. Well, it didn’t work! It only exacerbated the situation. If it’s any indication, I had my daughter 3 weeks early after my water broke, at work…
My fears were not in vain as 3 weeks before I returned to work, I receive a call from a senior manager on the team. (I’ll leave this person anonymous as they are a great friend for doing this and it’s likely not something they were allowed to do at the time. So, let’s call him “Joe”.) Joe called me at home and asked how I was doing. He was kind and stated he wanted to talk to me to let me know what was going on. This way, I wasn’t blindsided when I returned to work in 3 weeks. Joe informed me that the team had been restructured, I had lost my title as Director of the team and I will have a new manager when I return. In addition, the engineering team was sold off to another company and it included many of my long-time colleagues and friends. Well, isn’t that swell. When I get back to work, I inform my manager of my return and no one, I mean NO ONE is willing to give me information about what is going on and why my position was taken away. I was a star performer for over 7 years and there was no indication that the work I was doing was anything but superb. So, I wondered, why is it that I am demoted while on maternity leave?
I address my concerns to human resources who give me a song and dance about how I wasn’t “demoted” just “restructured”. I call bullsh*t and then they say “why don’t you find something else to do at the company”. Oh, why thank you kind sirs… you know you have me in between a rock and a hard place so you’ll suggest I make a decision to leave the group. Wonderful… the 7 years of hard work wasn’t worth anything to you… I now see this. So, like a good little soldier, I go find another job… and btw, I’m literally shunned by my old team for doing so, INCLUDING upper management that supposedly loved me.

Anyways… I don’t like to remember those times but as I have been back at work now for about a month, it’s clear to me that history repeats itself. Back in June 2010, I had just finished a monumental product release. I was just over 6 months pregnant and had a great supportive team and boss. I won an award for my work and was recognized by all the senior managers on the team. I’m feeling great. But wait… it’s time for it all to come crashing down again. I’m walking to a meeting and pass by a colleague in the hall and he says “Welcome to the team!” I say… “Thank you, but aren’t I already on the team?” He says “Oh, no I mean the new team… for ‘XYZ project’”. (FYI - I’m not using the true project name) Now what the heck is “XYZ project”… I have no clue. I come to find out (after much digging) that I was transferred to a new wonderful project and I have a new manager but my old manager has no idea this has happened. Well thank you very much people. Did you even ask me if I’d like to take on this new job? I had a great thing going with my last job. And they still need me! Well, I’m given a month to close out my old job and move over to the new one. By mid-July things are moving over nicely but the new job isn’t ready for me to do anything. So, work is getting less and less as time moves along. Now if you are reading this blog and you know me… this is not a good thing! I need work; it makes me happy to be busy. I can’t sit still! My new boss gives me menial tasks, things that I could probably have done my first year working at the company. There is even an incident where they will not invite me to necessary meetings so that I can participate in the new project. I literally cannot get my job done because senior managers are forcing me out of the loop. Even when I complain, I get some BS story that they don’t have enough room for me in the meeting room… yea… like that has ever stopped anyone! Ridiculous!

I wonder what the heck is going on and it becomes more and more apparent that my boss specifically is not willing to assign me anything important because I’m going out on leave (or he just doesn’t believe I can handle it). Again, while that might be good for some, it’s terrible for me. I’m stressing out that I’m not doing enough to keep my job, that I’m not going to get a good review next year and make my yearly bonus… all of this is killing me just weeks before I’m due with my second child.
After having Ella, I’m out on leave for 12 weeks again. I keep in touch with the people back at work and find that the new, wonderful XYZ project isn’t going anywhere. I get back to work and find out that there is literally NOTHING for me to do. I sit there for a week trying to catch up but there really isn’t anything to catch up on. So I confront my boss and he says to wait until the New Year (that’s 3 weeks away). Right before the holidays my boss sends out a meeting request to the team that states “finding our new mission” or something like that. He is literally trying to redefine the team so that we have jobs. Why did they pull the key people from various teams to sit around for 6 months and then tell them it’s not going to work out? All this for a company that is trying to reinvent its culture – great job guys!

So what am I doing now you ask? Again between a rock and a hard place, this star performer is left to find work so that I can feed the family (and keep the wonderful daycare that my kids have). This should prove to be exciting.
This is how maternity leave has killed my career. I’m again back at square-one willing to take any job that comes my way… so let me know if you’re hiring and have great daycare too. 
-S